Take Heart
One of the most valuable pieces of advice I got as a young mama with two under two, was not to worry too much about fixing age appropiate inappropriate behavior, because ninety-nine percent of things will pass and motherhood has different seasons marked by different challenges no matter the age.
In other words: "You aren't the worst mama ever. Kids can just be jerks and you're gunna make it out of this."
Before this life giving insight, I had spent so much time looking for affirmation in the way of seeking advice, that I had landed myself into a deep hole of approximently ninety-nine hundred pieces of advice (all clashing of course) and an even deeper feeling of inadequacy. So you can imagine the breath of relief I felt when that sweet friend reminded me that not every mis-step or poor attitude that we see in our kiddos is a direct representation of something we did or did not do.
Viewing our struggles in seasons allows us to lean into the hard and live in grace and abundance (instead of dread and guilt) knowing full well that we have a living hope and a bright future to cling too. The cool thing about seasons? They don't stick around for ever.
If you are in a season of sowing, don't you forget that you are enough and these struggles DO NOT define your proficiency as mama. I know how hard it hurts to feel judged, misunderstood, and alone. But, I also know that our guy Jesus offers real freedom from being a slave to what others may or may not be thinking of you. Real freedom means it's time to shift your focus from apperances on the outside and worry more about the heart of the matter on the inside.
I mean have you ever denied your kid a candy bar at the store and people look at you like you can't control your child. I get it, no one loves loud screaming, but can we get a little cred that instead of shushing our child with said candy bar we are standing our ground. When we let the opinions of others drown out to background noise, we can properly see these grocery store feats for what they are: victories!
So, take heart.
Your baby will eventually sleep through the night and no, you nursing them to sleep didn't ruin them forever.
Your two year old who likes to shriek instead of speak will find his words. You aren't encouraging a small vocabulary by not reading to him enough. One day he will actually sit down and not rip pages or crawl on you like a monkey or my personal favorite, walk straight out of the room mid story time making you feel like you totally failed your kid in the language arts department.
That three year old of yours who has pooped his underwear two times a day for the past year will eventually get a hang of the potty. I know this one may come as a shock, but after feeling like the biggest mom failure ever, cleaning tiny undies... a lot, letting anger get the best of you more than you would like to admit, and using a range of 10 million techniques with no such luck one day your kiddo will decide its a dang good day to poop on the potty and you will cry.
Maybe you have a little who expresses emotion by hitting or biting. This is one of those seasons where satan loves to taunt us and cover our mama minds with guilt that maybe if we didn't yell so much or fill in the blank, that our kids would use nice hands. THIS ONE TOO, WILL PASS. and all my fellow mamas of kiddos with big emotions said amen.
Trust me, I know how it feels to be desperately longing to be affirmed as a mama, just to fall flat on your face with a list of things to impliment in order to "fix" the little people God has entrusted to you (as if we don't have enough on our plates already am I right?!) Maybe they are indeed a little broken--but you wanna know a secret? We are all a little broken and we could ALL use a heavy dose the grace.
If you get anything from this, please take away that your worth sweet mama is not and will never be based on the performance of your kids.
There will be fits in public and jelly covered faces and little boys who demand to wear basketball shorts and sleeveless shirts for all occasions. Let those little imperfect details of your life reminder you that we are all flawed and not as filtered as we portray ourselves to be. Live your story and cherish your season. If it is a season that isn't easy to cherish...aka terrific twos ;) Then take heart, it won't be like this for long 🧡
In other words: "You aren't the worst mama ever. Kids can just be jerks and you're gunna make it out of this."
Before this life giving insight, I had spent so much time looking for affirmation in the way of seeking advice, that I had landed myself into a deep hole of approximently ninety-nine hundred pieces of advice (all clashing of course) and an even deeper feeling of inadequacy. So you can imagine the breath of relief I felt when that sweet friend reminded me that not every mis-step or poor attitude that we see in our kiddos is a direct representation of something we did or did not do.
Viewing our struggles in seasons allows us to lean into the hard and live in grace and abundance (instead of dread and guilt) knowing full well that we have a living hope and a bright future to cling too. The cool thing about seasons? They don't stick around for ever.
If you are in a season of sowing, don't you forget that you are enough and these struggles DO NOT define your proficiency as mama. I know how hard it hurts to feel judged, misunderstood, and alone. But, I also know that our guy Jesus offers real freedom from being a slave to what others may or may not be thinking of you. Real freedom means it's time to shift your focus from apperances on the outside and worry more about the heart of the matter on the inside.
I mean have you ever denied your kid a candy bar at the store and people look at you like you can't control your child. I get it, no one loves loud screaming, but can we get a little cred that instead of shushing our child with said candy bar we are standing our ground. When we let the opinions of others drown out to background noise, we can properly see these grocery store feats for what they are: victories!
So, take heart.
Your baby will eventually sleep through the night and no, you nursing them to sleep didn't ruin them forever.
Your two year old who likes to shriek instead of speak will find his words. You aren't encouraging a small vocabulary by not reading to him enough. One day he will actually sit down and not rip pages or crawl on you like a monkey or my personal favorite, walk straight out of the room mid story time making you feel like you totally failed your kid in the language arts department.
That three year old of yours who has pooped his underwear two times a day for the past year will eventually get a hang of the potty. I know this one may come as a shock, but after feeling like the biggest mom failure ever, cleaning tiny undies... a lot, letting anger get the best of you more than you would like to admit, and using a range of 10 million techniques with no such luck one day your kiddo will decide its a dang good day to poop on the potty and you will cry.
Maybe you have a little who expresses emotion by hitting or biting. This is one of those seasons where satan loves to taunt us and cover our mama minds with guilt that maybe if we didn't yell so much or fill in the blank, that our kids would use nice hands. THIS ONE TOO, WILL PASS. and all my fellow mamas of kiddos with big emotions said amen.
Trust me, I know how it feels to be desperately longing to be affirmed as a mama, just to fall flat on your face with a list of things to impliment in order to "fix" the little people God has entrusted to you (as if we don't have enough on our plates already am I right?!) Maybe they are indeed a little broken--but you wanna know a secret? We are all a little broken and we could ALL use a heavy dose the grace.
If you get anything from this, please take away that your worth sweet mama is not and will never be based on the performance of your kids.
There will be fits in public and jelly covered faces and little boys who demand to wear basketball shorts and sleeveless shirts for all occasions. Let those little imperfect details of your life reminder you that we are all flawed and not as filtered as we portray ourselves to be. Live your story and cherish your season. If it is a season that isn't easy to cherish...aka terrific twos ;) Then take heart, it won't be like this for long 🧡
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